Friday, July 11, 2008

Day3 Tourists,Trebouchers and all that

Day 3 we decide to go "Nessie Spotting" you know, Loch Ness, The Loch Ness Monster. I am hurting big time, nuff said, but decide to pack a picnic (Lord knows we have enough food thanks to the mums) I throw some chicken into some rolls, some crisps(that would be chips here) and a few biscuits ( that would be cookies) into a bag and off we go. Three hours later and no closer to our destination ( had forgotten the single track roads and bedraggled sheep on the aforementioned roads) we pull over into a Lay-by next to a Dam, very picturesque. I open the boot (that would be trunk) and present my "picnic" to the hungry hoards. The sex bomb and the child Iseult are looking at their 2inch Brioche rolls with nothing more than a slice of chicken in them, aghast. WTF? says the sex bomb, peering inside his wee roll. "No Mayo, No salad, No nothing?" I was busting up.
"What did you expect? Subway?" To which daughter2 pipes up "nope daddy it's a Momway"
We ate up our meagre rations and headed off for Fort Augustas at the bottom of the Loch.
We parked the car next to half a dozen Tour Buses and headed into town, first stop Toilet (that would be Restrooms) I go in with the girls and there are around 10 to 14 Asian ladies in there. The child Iseult looks at me perturbed and whispers " Mom why are there so many Asian people here?"
I'm not really thinking about her puzzled tone, so I reply " Oh they probably came in on one of the big buses out there"
"What?" she shrieks.
It had not occurred to me that she has never seen a Tour Bus, had no idea how popular a tourist attraction Scotland is, especially with Asian Countries, (for which Scotland's Economy is very grateful) and that she was expecting men in Kilts with Bagpipes!
"What do you mean they come in on buses?" " From where?" "What do they do here?"
At this point I'm stifling down what I just know is going to be one of my hearty from the belly snortlaughs which those of you who know me appreciate but which I did not consider an appropriate response. Herded the girls out and had to explain all about Tourism and Big Tour Buses. Too funny.
Watched some boats going up through the locks on the Caledonian Canal which Scoot loved, the girls not so much, then back in the car and off to Urquart Castle, which lies half way up the loch and is one of my personal favourites. It's pretty much in ruin but oh my, talk about location, location, location.
The last time I was there was probably 1984 at which time you pulled into a Lay-by and took some photos, there was no access. I was delighted when we arrived to find that The National Trust for Scotland has built a whole tourist visitor centre. We went in watched the movie then down to the Castle. They had a full size replica Treboucher which was really neat and the girls spent some time discussing whether or not they could fire daddy from it and if so would he hit the deep dark waters of the loch! The general consensus was that he would indeed hit the loch and that maybe we should charge tourists to Treboucher the sexbomb!
Wonderful day, full of fun an laughter, we sang most of the way home, me teaching the kids some old Scottish songs I had forgotten I knew. Aye you can take the woman out of Scotland but you can't take Scotland out of the woman.
Suffering terribly from jet-lag. Sleeping by 8p.m. last night and awake at 4a.m., still awake.
The Cuckoo Clock has landed! The relief when I opened the door to find BF with nothing larger than a small backpack. I've been worried sick about this darned bird and she hands me, wait for it, a FRIDGE MAGNET! Whew.
We laughed, me a tad hysterically. We must have had a mind meld going on though because I had brought her The Loch Ness Monster equivalent. Great to have great buddies.
Text messaging with my "Wandering Cowboy" yesterday. He's my boy and I miss him.
Laughter and tears chatting to the HG this morning, we could talk for ever but both had stuff to do so had to curb our enthusiasm and get on with the day which I intend to get right onto now.
Oh before I go, note all the translations? And we all speak English? I think NOT.

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