The Wedding Night
SB called 999 (911 equivalent) who arrived promptly, hooked SBs mom up to a gazillion monitors, hefted her onto a gurney and headed out the door of the restaurant to the awaiting ambulance.
I look round to find SB and the maitre'd at loggerheads.
WTF?
The Manager was insisting that SB settle the bill before he left...ehm
"Your chariot awaits Mr Groom"
Not only that, he wanted us to also pay for wine we had ordered but not received and deserts, ditto!
What ya gonna do?
SB paid up.
We all loaded up into the "transport", the doors were slammed shut and we were off...wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
No Limousine for me dear reader, hell no, give me an Edinburgh Ambulance, sirens blaring, any day.
A Limo can't quite shake your bridal bouquet the way a high speed ambulance can...believe me
We arrived at The Royal Infirmary where SBs mom was rushed away to ICU.
SB, me and my mom sat down in a "WTF just happened" kinda way.
A few hours later, the doctor informed us that she was going to be okay but would have to stay in hospital for a couple of days.
SIGHS of relief all round.
The problem was that it was around 2a.m. we were on the other side of town from our hotel AND we still had my Mom in tow!
Nurse - We do have family rooms if you would like to just spend the night here
My Mom - Oh that's a great idea!
SB/Me - speechless
We were lead ( my mom up front chatting away to the nurse, SB and I still speechless) to a room located at the top of the building.
Of course the lift ( elevator ) was out of order...My mom wasn't quite so talkative as we neared our goal. Panting and hanging onto the rail of the stairs...just as well we were in a Hospital!
One down one to go?
Sheesh...
Right there! Second on the left! Can you see me waving my bouquet at y'all?
The room had a bed and a sofa.
My Mom - Oh, why don't you two take the bed, it's your Wedding Night after all. (REALLY?)
Me - Will you be ok on the sofa? ( I am not a happy Bride)
My Mom - Oh don't worry about me, I'll probably not sleep anyway. Is that a T.V.? I wonder if there's anything worth watching at this time of night?
SB - I'm going to go back down and check on my Mom...
Off he goes and there I am, left with my MOM, on my wedding night.
My Mom - (all giggly) Well this'll be a funny one to tell people about.
Yes Mom, hilarious!
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11 comments:
WORST. WEDDING NIGHT. EVER!!!
I can't believe that seriously happened! You lead a crazy life, my love.
Lilu - Crazy doesn't even come close!
You couldn't make this shit
up! Wait for the
Honeymoon...!!
Oh, this is awesome. I mean, awesomely terrible and scary, I'm sure, but awesome all the same. LMBO, as they say in polite circles.
Abbot - glad your being eckin polite about it! LMBO :-)
Ah, my dear Fiona...now I understand why you are the way you are. You are truly one of a kind. Thank goodness.
vw: bessear - The Queen's auditory apparatus.
Bilbo - Thank you dear...I think? :)
Well this must be the MOST MEMORABLE wedding story I've ever heard!
Amanda - you don't want to see the photos! You REALLY don't...sigh
"Well this'll be a funny one to tell people about."
She was right!
Wait.... she was going to sleep on the couch because it was your wedding night? Did she really think that would make a difference in what was going to happen after all that? And with her in the room? Is she some kind of voyeur or something?
Mike - Oh yeah? Look at me still peeing my pants!
Gilahi - sigh
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