19th Nervous Breakdown by The Rolling Stones

The Wedding.

Well my dears, as I'm sure you can only begin to imagine, it was all downhill...
We had decided just to go to the city and have a civil ceremony.
I had already done the "Bride" thing in a previous life and was quite content with that decision.
I had suggested we just grab two unsuspecting eejits off the street to stand as witnesses and SB concurred.
We didn't tell anyone of our plans.
As the "Day" came closer I started to feel bad for SB's mom.
He is, after all, her first born, only son. Wanted for NOTHING!




Against my better judgement ( hindsight is a wonderful thing) I asked him to tell his mom and ask her if she would be a witness.
I did the same with mine.
The Wedding Day dawned, warm and sunny.
We four, headed off to Edinburgh on the train.
SB and I had booked a Hotel for 3 nights,then we were off on honeymoon ( yeah sexy time)
Taking the moms to the City was akin to a Special Ed outing gone BAD.
As they Oohed and Ahh'd like Japanese tourists, we managed to manoeuvre them to the Registrars Building.
Ceremony went well, I cried.
Still feckin crying! LOL
We then took the Moms out to the Dubh Prais restaurant located on the Royal Mile.



Quite posh nosh.
We order and are served our starters. Tres bon!
We ordered our entrees and as we were waiting SBs mom said she had indigestion and was going to make a head call.
The food arrived and we began to chomp down.
Did I mention we were on champagne bottle No 7? AND the mums don't drink!
Five minutes into some delicious grub we noticed SBs mum had still not returned.
Being the kind soul I am...not, I went to the Ladies to check on her.
OMFG!
There she was, propped up against the wall, on her bum, false teeth on her chest, unconscious.
I friggin kid you not!
HEART ATTACK TIME.
For feck sake, I know I'm no oil painting BUT it was a tad extreme...No?



The Wedding Night, to be continued...