Brand New Day - Sting

Happy Monday Dears.
I thought I didn't have much to say today, until I went into the shower.
No, nothing naughty just getting ready for a new day.
The following occurred:
Excited the hair with shampoo then agitated it with conditioner.
Discarded unwanted hair delicately from Oxters and legs (both) not forgetting big toes (both).
I forgot a toe once ( how does that happen? how can you forget to shave a toe?) wore sandals to work and was referred to as "Yeti Toe" for the next six years.
Overwhelmed towel by drying everything.
Body lotion/buttered everything, worrying, the now "bare" bits.
Rummaged around under the Oxters with Dove deodorant.
Titillated face with Ponds gentle cleanser.
Re hydrated daintily with anti-aging face creams, of which I have a plethora .
Teased the hair for a while with a wide toothed comb.
Tickled teeth until the toothbrush beeped then provoked them with floss.
Prepared to get dressed.
Humiliated least mangled/grayish brassiere and tricked it into fitting.
Harassed a g-string for however long THAT took.
Worried a pair of skinny jeans for ten minutes then tormented an old baggy sweater.
Back to the mirror eeeeekkkkkk.
Concealed recently acquired "adult acne"
Embarrassed eyes with blue liner.
Humiliated lips with gloss.
Invigorated hair with both hands.
It's not easy being me...
Stumbled downstairs.