I am having more "blond" moments than I care to share.
This morning, off I trundle to Wally World.
The Sex Bomb had informed me that he needed a new tool box.
I decide to go all out and buy him a hughfeckinmungolicious (new word - add to fispeak)
bright red shiny contraption. On wheels!
He can walk around with it!
Show off to the neighbours!
March pompously around the court fixing things...whatever, I'm just being silly now.
Wally World Wombatical Assistant(WWWA) - Would you like help?
Me - ( Nah, do I look like a wimpy woman?) Of course I need help.
(This is one BIG red "Mummy Humper")!
I pay at the checkout.
Now a second WWWA has gimped over to assist WWWA No1.
Out to the car and following some rather serious exertions ( I was sure one or both of them were going to require medical attention) my luverrly red tool thingy is loaded into the car.
WWWA 1 and 2 take the rest of the day off.
I doubt they did but I would have recommended it, if I had cared.
They were both gimping more and looked a tad more rabid.
Not to worry.
I'm happy.
I smile all the way home, yep all 31/2 minutes of grinning.
I pull into the drive, get out of the car, open the trunk.
WTF was I thinking?
No way in hell I'm moving that Mummy Humper anywhere.
So it sits. Alone.
I'm going to cheer it up by slapping a bow on it.
SB cannot go near my car until HOHOHO.
I'm also going to throw a couple of jackets over it, we had frost this morning.
FROST.
I had to De-ice the car.
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr YES I roll a very good R!
8 comments:
SNAP-ON!!! You da WOMAN! Now all you have to do is load it up with snap-on tools. You can do one of those quick in quick out withdrawal things at your local bank to pay for them.
"...Wombatical Assistant..."????
I thought wombats were native only to Australia...do they also have them in Scotland and California? One of my dreams on my worst days at work is to be able to retire to the peace and quiet of the Australian outback and breed wombats.
Mike - *curtsy* why thank you kind sir!
Bilbo - Wally Wombat, I suppose I could have used Wallaby or Weasel sorry if I destroyed your dream.
"breed wombats" oooookkkaaay!
Fiona - "glue strings on tea bags" was my second choice.
You just spent money for nothing.
It means he wanted a new 'box' for his 'tool.'
Grounds for divorce in most marriages...unless you're into that shit.
If you are...well....merry Christmas to him.
Is it wrong that I giggle at "snap on tools"?
Probably.
Bilbo - we need to talk darlin!
Moog - OMG SEE!! another blond moment! If the wee fatty, baldy, Scottish S(o)B had the same idea then divorce indeed!
LA - Gigggle away sister...it's Christmas. Just settle down a tad on the eggnog, only a suggestion.
Eggnog? Who's drinking eggnog? Pass it over here!
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