Thursday, January 29, 2009

Throw The 'R' Away - The Proclaimers

My girls are very eloquent.
I have no idea how that happened.
I take no credit whatsoever although I do have a veritable Thesaurus of cuss words.
The Child Iseult uses words that I have to sneak away and google - definition.
WT, just the other day used "serendipity"
Who the hell uses Serendipity?
WT, that's who.
Where am I going with this?
Oh yes...
I just need to shut up.
Why? Well, here's the quandary.
Spellathons. Sponsored Spellathons to be more precise.
WT had 120 words, on a list, that she had to be able to spell for the big Spellafeckinthon today.
WT - Mommy will you read my words so I can practice?
Me- Sure ( I CAN read after all)
WT - Ok, lets start!
Me - Where
WT - WEAR
Me - No darlin, WHERE
WT - I told you WEAR
Me- No babe, mommy said WHERE
WT - And I told you WEAR
Me - Ok listen W H E R E
WT - Oh you mean where?
Me - That's what I've been saying!
WT - No mom you've really not!
Me - Have too!
WT - Hold on ( calls The Child Iseult downstairs)
WT - Ok Mommy say it to TCI
Me- Ok smartypants. TCI spell where please!
TCI - WEAR
Me- *expletive* (mumbled of course)
WT - Told ya, told ya! (giggling insanely)
TCI - WT don't ask Mom to do your spelling, I had the same problem, she talks funny.
Me - WHAT
WT/TCI - You do Mommy!
Me - I do?
WT/ TCI - Yes.
WT - It's okay Mom, it's not your fault that you can't pronounce words properly. Your accent does have a certain nuance though (smiling with pity?)

Nuance? Who the hell says Nuance?

MY MOUTH IS SHUT!

14 comments:

AbbotOfUnreason said...

Oh, gosh, they look so old. Am I getting old, too? Say it isn't so.

I had the same problem as a kid. I was a spelling bee whiz until I moved down to Tennessee. Every word had sixteen or seventeen more syllables when they said them. I couldn't figure out a thing.

fiona said...

Abbot - I know! I was pretty unsettled when I watched them. Sorry to tell you we ARE getting on a bit...

Mike said...

I hate speeling. And it's pretty bad when your kids think you sound like a foreigner. It's a good thing you got them to the US as young as they are so they could learn to talk gooder.

wv - trainet (a female trainee)

fiona said...

Mike - I rest on my laurels in the knowledge that they couldn't pass a spelling test in "English" EVER! lol

LiLu said...

I love the word "nuance". Hopefully she can spell it...

fiona said...

Lilu - Hell yeh she can...wee shyte!

Bilbo said...

Ah, the joys of accents. Agnes speaks excellent English, but there's no doubt in anyone's mind that she's German. On the other hand, I speak very good German, but an accent...just not an American accent. People in Germany knew I wasn't German, but always thought I was Dutch. Go figure. And spelling is another issue. Too many people nowadays can't spell because they rely on the spell-checker in their word processors to keep them out of trouble...which is why you read lots of documents full of howlers that confuse "to, too, and two" or "there and their" and so on. By the way, a few years ago Microsoft Word's spelling checker told me that it didn't recognize the word "Agnes," and suggested that I might instead mean "agonies." She didn't think it was as funny as I did.

Diane Mandy said...

I was and am a TERRIBLE speller. Thank goodness for Spell check.

But my how bright your children are!

fiona said...

Bilbo - I'm "accused" these days of being Australian! yep go figure

fiona said...

Diane - Thanks for reading/posting!
Amen for Spell Check!
Smart kids...the jury is out on that one :0)

John said...

My mother is from the Philippines and has an accent. When she was substitute teaching (several decades go) the kids always laughed when she told them to get a sheet of paper.
Apparently sheet didn't sound like sheet.

When she first came to the States, she had an interview with a small town newspaper reporter. The reporter couldn't believe that she was talking about all the beautiful bitches in the Philippines. She meant beaches!

fiona said...

John - I feel for her, I really do!lol

Narm said...

You should have asked her to spell it.

fiona said...

Narm - Hehehehe, IT right? right?