Saturday, November 15, 2008

The Cutter, Echo and The Bunnymen

For your entertainment I have decided to try and master my cut and paste skills.

Since I appreciate from the bottom of my heart, those of you who come here, of your own free will (as well as those who fall in here unexpectedly trying to get somewhere else and of those, only the ones who take the time to read anything) I am calling in my list of expert funny men to ensure you stay awake during what may be a long process.
I intend to be completely honest by giving exact time frames.
---takes a deep breath, sits up tall, right index finger warmed up ---
11.47 a.m. GO

11.49 Eddie Izzard for your pleasure:- Horseshoes are lucky. Horses have four bits of lucky nailed to their feet. They should be the luckiest animals in the world. They
should rule the country. They should win all their horse races, at least. "In the
fifth race today, every single horse was first horse threw a shoe came in third...the duck was ninth...and five ran."

11.50 Eddie: We stole countries! That's how you build an empire. We stole countries with the cunning use of flags! Sail halfway around the world, stick a flag in. "I claim India for Britain." And they're going, "You can't claim us. We live here! There's five hundred million of us." "Do you have a flag?" "We don't need a flag, this is our country you bastard!"

11.52 Eddie again...But with dogs, we do have “bad dog.” Bad dog exists. “Bad dog! Bad dog! Stole a biscuit, bad dog!” The dog is saying, “Who are you to judge me? You human beings who’ve had genocide, war against people of different creeds, colors, religions, and I stole a biscuit?! Is that a crime? People of the world!”
"Well, if you put it that way, I think you've got a point. Have another biscuit,sorry."

11.55 Ricky Gevaise (David Brent) : “What is the single most important thing for a company? Is it the building? Is it the stock? Is it the turnover? It’s the people, investment in people. My proudest moment here wasn’t when I increased profits by 17%, or cut expenditure without losing a single member of staff. No. It was a young Greek guy, first job in the country, hardly spoke a word of English, but he came to me and he went ‘Mr. Brent, will you be the Godfather to my child?’. Didn’t happen in the end. We had to let him go, he was rubbish. He was rubbish!”

12.00 Ali G : One time when me was high, me sold me car for like 24 chicken McNuggets.

12.05 Borat: Democracy is different in America. For example: women can vote but horse can not!

12.07 Robin Williams : “Do you think God gets stoned? I think so . . . look at the platypus.

12.08 Robin: Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.

Ok now for some pics.

12.08 Thank you Eddie
eddie izzard banner Pictures, Images and Photos
12.10 Thank you Ricky
David Brent Pictures, Images and Photos
12.12 Thank you Ali G
Ali G Pictures, Images and Photos
12.14 Thank you Borat
borat Pictures, Images and Photos
12.15 Thank you Robin
Robin Williams Pictures, Images and Photos

12.20 That's all folks. Mission accomplished. Thank you for your patience and have a Happy Saturday.


Mike said...

10:01 You can
10:04 type pretty
10:07 damn fast.

fiona said...

@ Mike - (r) index finger in ICU

weirdtales said...

good point..we're policing the whole feckini' world..& I bitch about my dumb ass dog eatin' unbaked brownies! I hafta figure out what this stupid word below me sez..WT